Shared
by SpiritReaper13
Summary: A oneshot about Wanda's life in her new body. Her life with Ian and her friendship wih Melanie. Some minor sexual content.


**Shared**

The rain had stop, and life in the caves went back to normal – for most of us, at least. I was finding the new situation completely abnormal, but it thrilled me at the same time. With Jamie moving into another room and Ian's clear invitation, I would be moving into the familiar bedroom, under completely unfamiliar circumstances.

It was late when Ian and I walked down the tunnel to the room – our room – on that first night. We had spent the whole day cleaning up the Game Room, and he had already dragged our mattresses back earlier that afternoon. Most of the evening had been spent having a sort of party, celebrating the end of the rains. We ate the candy bars I'd purchased during our last raid, we listened to a battery operated radio (something Kyle had suggested I pick up in the store), and several people, possibly influenced by the chocolate, danced in the middle of the Game Room floor. Jared and Melanie were among this group.

Ian, using one of his decks of playing cards, had used the party as an opportunity to teach Jamie and I how to play poker, betting with candy bars. This was something which I proved to be absolutely horrible at.

"I knew you would be," Ian said, grinning as he scooted the pile of candy bars I'd just lost towards. "This game involves lying, and let's face it. You suck at lying."

Jamie proved to be pretty good at poker, though not quite as good as Ian. Jared, who joined us towards the end of the party, after Melanie had proclaimed she was exhausted and headed to their room, was pretty good at it, too. Though, he'd proven himself a fabulous liar on my last night in Melanie's body – the night that was meant to be my last alive.

I tried not to think about that night.

Once the party died down, Jared and Jamie going off to their respective rooms, yawning the whole way, and Kyle carrying Sunny, who'd already fallen asleep, out of the Game Room, Ian turned to look at me. "Are you tired?" he asked.

"Very," I admitted, my pitched voice marred by a big yawn – bigger than one would expect from this little body I inhabited.

Ian smiled. "Alright," he said, gathering his cards and shoving them into their box. He picked up the stack of candy bars he had one – most of them mine – and shoved most of them into his pockets, carrying the excess in his right hand. With his free hand, he reached out to me, pulling both of us to our feet. "Good night, Jeb!" Ian called as we started towards the exit. "Good night, everyone!"

"Night!" I called over my shoulder as Ian led me from the room.

As we neared our room, I felt my heart beating faster and harder in my chest. There was a great degree of anticipation that came with this new room assignment. I wanted this. I wanted to be with Ian in every sense, but part of me was still a little afraid of … well, of everything. I knew from Melanie's memories and words, and a little from my own instincts, what was supposed to occur when a man and a woman shared a bed, but there was still a feeling of unknown – of mystery. I didn't like mysteries.

We reached our room and Ian pushed back the red door, allowing me to enter the room ahead of him. Instantly, I felt my stomach plummet and my heart stop. The mattresses were as they used to be – pushed against opposite sides of the wall. The only difference now compared to how the room was before was that my positions, what few I had, were placed around the right side of the room.

Ian entered behind me, hugging my shoulders with one arm as he passed me, walking to the head of his mattress. "I can't imagine how tired you must be," Ian was saying as he placed the playing cards and chocolate bars on the cupboard at the top of the room. "I'm exhausted, and you didn't sleep good last night. Jamie said you tossed and turned. He said you nearly kicked him off of his mattress. I guess I slept to deeply to notice. Were you having a nightmare?" He turned to look at me, and he stopped suddenly. "Wanda? Is something the matter?"

"No," I lied, sitting down on my mattress – my single mattress – across the room from him. "I'm fine. I'm tired. Good night, Ian." I laid down on the mattress, facing my back towards him, not wanting to betray myself with the sadness on my face. I'd assumed, when he'd invited me to live in his room with him, that things would be different. I'd assumed he'd meant … but clearly, I was wrong.

Was it this body? It was beautiful, certainly, but did it look too fragile? Was he afraid of hurting me? It couldn't have been my age. I'd lied about that, and, for once, I hadn't been caught. Ian thought that this body was eighteen, a legal adult. He didn't realize it was a year younger than that. Why didn't he want me?

I felt his hand touch my shoulder, applying enough pressure to flip me back over, facing him. "I told you. You're a horrible liar. What's bothering you?"

"Nothing, I—"

"Wanderer."

I sighed. His use of my full name made it clear he wasn't allowing room for falsehoods. "The beds," I said, quietly. When he still looked confused, I continued. "They're still separated, like they used to be. Why don't you want to touch me?"

Ian's eyebrows raised simultaneously, then he began to laugh. I admit that I was hurt, and I started to roll away from him again, but he caught my arm. "Don't. Don't, Wanda. I'm sorry. I just didn't expect that to be the problem." He smiled at me. "I'm sorry," he said, again. "I didn't mean to upset you. I just didn't want to rush you into anything or make you feel pressured. I wasn't sure how you felt about … you know."

"Ian," I said. "We've been sleeping next to each other for weeks in the Game Room. I don't think pushing our mattresses together is rushing anything." I didn't mention how anxious I had been about this night ever since he'd asked me to live with him.

Ian nodded. He got to his feet and walked across the room. It was completely dark, now. The stars had vanished behind clouds, and I couldn't see what he was doing. I heard some movement, but it was so jumbled that I didn't understand it. A moment later, I felt the other mattress collide with mine. I felt Ian's pressure shake the bed, and his arm slid around me, pulling me next to him.

"Better?" he asked. All I could see were his bright, blue eyes in the darkness.

"Much," I said.

Ian's lips found mine in the darkness. It was like an electric current surged through me suddenly. The kiss had started out gentle – a good night kiss, maybe – but I think my reaction was a little more than he'd expected. I wrapped my arm around his neck, my fingers twisting in his dark hair. One of my legs rose up, hooking around his waist to hold him closer to me.

Ian's response was immediate. He pushed me flat onto my back, rolling practically on top of me as his kiss harder and deeper. My other arm wrapped around his back, my palm resting between his shoulder blades. As Ian's tongue danced with mine, I felt the electric current pulse through me, as the lava, beneath the surface, moved slow and deep.

Ian's mouth parted from mine as he pushed up slightly, not wanting to hurt my tiny body under his bulk, and left me gasping for air. His lips were still only inches from mine as he asked, "Good or bad?"

"Very good," I panted. "But…"

"But?" I could see a flicker of worry in his blue eyes.

I hesitated, feeling the shyness of this new body kick in again. "It's just … I was wonder if, on the raids, anyone had thought to get any…"

"Any what?" Ian asked, clearly confused.

I felt incredibly embarrassed as I searched my vocabulary for the word I was looking for. It wasn't one Pet had been familiar with, but Melanie had. "Condoms," I squeaked, my cheeks getting instantly hot.

I could see the surprise in Ian's eyes. After a pause, he said, "We, uh, we thought about it. After all, there are a lot of men living here and…" He cleared his throat awkwardly. "Yes," he said, finally. "We – I have some, but are you sure, Wanda? Do you want to?"

"I do," I said, my voice still quiet and high pitched. "If you do."

"Oh," Ian said, his blue eyes darkening slightly. "Believe me, I want to." As he kissed me again, hard and fierce, I had no doubt of his truthfulness.

I wasn't allowed to go on the next raid, but I wasn't he only one. Most of the group, save for Ian, Kyle, Sunny, and Jeb, had come down with a cold a few weeks after the rains ended. Doc said it was the change in weather patterns, but with it being nothing more than a cold, something that would end on its own, there was no reason to use up our whole stock of Health to cure us.

So only the healthy four were able to go on the raid, because souls, with such easy access to medicine, would look suspicious if they were sneezing. So it was Ian, Kyle, Jeb, and Sunny, who had to be seriously coaxed into going.

"I'll be back in a few days," Ian had said before he left, kissing me on the forehead. "Take it easy, okay? That cold will only get worse if you don't."

"I'm fine," I said, through my stuffy nose. It was a strange sensation to be sick. It was my first time with a cold, and it felt miserable. I couldn't breathe, and when I could, my nose was running like crazy. I was constantly coughing, and my throat was in agonizing pain. How did humans deal with season changes? According to Doc, there was no human cure for this ailment.

The cold wasn't the only thing making me miserable. I had gotten so used to sharing my bedroom with Ian, that is absence made the room feel almost eerie. I avoided walking in there during the day, because looking at his possessions, knowing I wouldn't see him for a few days, tended to fill me with a sense of panic and anxiety.

I put off going to my room as long as I could the first night of the long raid. I stayed in the kitchen with Melanie, making bread for the next morning. We were almost out of groceries from our last raid, and more were needed. Mel and I talked and baked until the rest of the humans had gone to bed. Finally, when my body could handle no more, I said, "I'm tired. I think I'll go to bed now."

"Good idea," Mel said, covering a tray of rolls with some foil to preserve them through the night. "I think I will to."

We walked down the familiar hallways together, talking along the way. "Well, good night," I said, when we reached the red and gray doors to mine and Ian's room. I was surprised when Melanie followed me inside, not continuing down the hallway.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"We," Melanie said, kicking off her sneakers and plopping down onto Ian's side of the bed with a thud, "are having a slumber party."

"We are?"

"You bet."

"But what about Jared?" I asked.

Melanie's cold was almost better. Her voice was not nearly as stuffy as mine. "Jamie is going to stay with him tonight. He got along without me for a long time, but I can't leave my friend all alone, can I?"

"Melanie, I—"

She looked at me seriously. "Don't argue with me, Wanda. The way I see it, you've never really, really slept alone. You always had me in your head, and when I was gone, we were all in the Game Room, so you really weren't alone. I can already tell you're on edge with Ian gone, and sleeping by yourself will only make it worse." She flopped down on the pillow, making it clear that she wasn't budging. "Besides," she added, "I kind of miss sharing with you."

"Really?" I was laying down on my side of the bed now, propped on my side so that I was facing Melanie.

"It sounds crazy," Mel went on, "but sometimes, I wish I was still in your head. At least there we could carry on private conversations without anyone hearing. Now, either Jared or Ian is always around, and they'll always hear what I say to you. It's those little things I miss, you know?" She found my hand in the darkness, squeezing it lightly. "You don't mind me staying with you, do you?"

"No," a said, falling onto my back and staring up at the ceiling. "Actually, I'm relieved. You're right. I've never really slept alone, and the idea scares me sometimes. I have these nightmares a lot – nightmares where I am on another planet. I've been sent away from here, away from Ian and you and Jamie and Jared. When I wake up, when it's dark, sometimes I think I'm on the world of the bats. When Ian is here, I can hear his breathing or feel his arm next to me, and I know it was a dream. Alone, though … it scares me."

"No one is sending you away," Mel said, squeezing my hand again.

"I'm glad."

There was a long silence. "So, how has it been? Sharing a room with Ian, I mean. Do you like it?"

I wasn't sure which part she was referring to – being roommates with Ian or the things that came along with it – so I simply answered, "Yes. I love it."

I knew Melanie was grinning. I could feel it, in a strange way. In so many ways, it was as if we were still connected. We no longer shared a body, but parts of her mind were still fused to me, it seemed. I hoped that would never change. I liked holding on to a little piece of Melanie.

Melanie stayed in my room all three nights of the raid, and I found that I really enjoyed it. For once, we got to talk without the company of our partners, and it was almost like old times again. Still, however, I was getting impatient for Ian to return.

I was walking down the tunnel to the main plaza on the fourth day, when I heard voices echoing from the large room. I hurried forward with excitement, which was an interesting sensation in this body. I was sure that this meant Ian was back, and I was already forming a plan in my head for how to steal him away from everyone. I didn't want to share him with anyone for a while. I had missed him so much!

My excitement died, however, when I got a little closer to the plaza. I could hear that these voices weren't happy ones. Intead, they were full of worry, anger, and fear. This sped me forward even more. Was someone hurt? Was it Sunny? Was it Kyle or Jeb? Had Kyle messed up again, risking our secrets?

When I entered the plaza, I felt everyone's head turn to look at me. I couldn't read their expressions. They were strange. I met Melanie's eye, and I instantly felt her surge of sadness. She looked away from me instantly, her hand taking Jared's, who was at her side.

"What's going on?" I asked aloud, my high pitched voice ringing through the crowded plaza.

"Oh … Wanda." Trudy lowered her head sadly, her fingers twisting momentarily in my golden hair. "Oh…"

Now I was scared. "Ian?" I asked, pulling away from Trudy and pushing through the crowd. I knew, suddenly, that something was wrong with Ian – _my_ Ian. Why else would everyone be looking at me like this?

At the front of the plaza, I found Doc kneeling over a thin matt, like the ones I had slept on in the hallway near my hole so long ago. Pressed against the back wall, looks of worry and terror on their faces, were Sunny and Kyle. Neither would meet my eyes. Next to them was Jeb, who was staring at the matt, his eyes expressionless. And on the matt was…

"Ian!"

I rushed to Doc's side, kneeling by the matt. Ian's eyes were closed, and he wasn't conscious. I examined him for a moment, but it didn't take me long to find the source of the problem. On his shirt, on one side of his stomach, was a large stain of dark red-brown. Blood.

"Ian! Ian!" I cried, already feeling panicked. I looked up at Kyle and demanded, "What happened to him?"

"He was … shot," Kyle choked, still not meeting my eyes. "In Tucson. It was a seeker."

My eyes widened. Shot? By a gun? By a seeker?

"Why didn't you get him to a healer right away?" I yelled, knowing that this should not have been my first question. I should have asked about the seeker. I should have asked if we were in danger, but that was not my concern. Leave those questions to the rest. I only cared, at that moment, about my Ian.

"It would have been too suspicious," Jeb said, plainly. "Your kind don't just shoot each other, so how would we be able to explain our situation?"

I glared at Jeb. Damn suspicion to hell! Ian was hurt! Ian was bleeding!

"We bandaged him up the best we could," Sunny said, earnestly. "And we gave him so No Pain. We rushed back so that we could get him to Doc."

I looked at Doc, all of my questions conveyed through my eyes.

"I think the bullet missed all of his vital organs," Doc told me, his voice determinedly calm. "I used as much Heal was we had left, but we ran out. I don't know if it will be enough. I tried to seal and clean the wound so that bleeding to death wouldn't be an issue, but that's all I can do. He's not in any pain. All we can do now is wait and see what happens."

I looked down at the unconscious face of my partner, trying not to let my emotions get the better of me. I couldn't say anything.

"We should move him to the hospital," Sharon suggested.

Kyle and Jared moved to either end of the matt, preparing to carry Ian away.

"No." I stood up. "Take him to our room. He'll be more comfortable there." I ignored the dirty looks that I knew Sharon was giving me. She still didn't trust me, but that was the last worry I had right now.

Kyle and Jared carried Ian to our room. As the majority of our group – our family – walked down the tunnel, I felt Melanie and Jamie slide on either side of me, taking my hands in theirs to comfort me.

The two men placed Ian, very carefully, on his side of the bed. Once they stepped away, Doc kneeled beside the mattress. I climbed onto my side of the bed, sitting next to Ian, taking his hand in mine and squeezing it as tight as my little, frail fingers would allow. His hand was so big compared to mine.

"Tell us what happened," Melanie said, sitting on the mattress beside me. She was talking to Kyle, who had walked around the bed to stand near us.

"We got pulled over … speeding," Kyle explained, his voice quiet and hesitant. I knew his eyes were on me, watching for my reactions. "It should have been fine. Sunny was driving, so it should have been fine. As the seeker got close to the car, though, his flashlight moved across me before I could close my eyes. It's my fault," Kyle said, his voice choked with emotion. I didn't see his face, my eyes so focused on the perfect features on his brother, but I was sure there would be tears there.

"The seeker made us all get out of the car," Kyle continued. "We did. I was sure we could get out of it. Four of us and one of him. This one was more violent than most of the souls, though. It … He shot at Jeb. Ian pushed him out of the way, and the bullet caught him."

"What happened to the seeker?" I heard Jamie ask, breathlessly from the other side of Melanie.

"He shot one of mine," I heard Jeb answer. "So I shot back. I know that's not how you would want it, Wanda, but—"

"It's fine," I said, and I meant it. It was a mark of the seriousness of the situation that I was somehow okay with the death of another living creature. But any soul who would hurt my Ian – try to kill Jeb – was not one I would want to preserve.

"Are we in trouble?" I heard Jared ask, nervously. "Do we need to start packing?"

"No," Jeb answered. "Kyle and I covered up the scene pretty good. We made it look like his own gun backfired on him. If they do suspect humans, they won't trace it back to us. We're fine."

I looked across Ian at Doc, trying to convey a message without words. Doc seemed to get it, because her rose to his feet. "There are too many people in here," he said. "Everyone should move along."

"We need to load in the stuff from the raid," Jeb agreed. "Come on, Kyle … Jamie, you and Aaron can help me, too. Keep us posted, Doc."

A large group of the men walked out of the room. I heard Jared say, "I … I think I'll help them." His footsteps echoed as he entered the tunnels again.

"Paige, Heidi, Lily," I heard Trudy say. "Will you three help Jeffrey, Heath, and I finish getting lunch ready for everyone."

Another group left the room.

After a moment, I looked up to find that only Doc, Melanie, and I remained in the room. I couldn't help but wonder if Sharon and Maggie had even walked in here. Was their hatred of me enough to keep them away from a wounded friend? At that point, I didn't even care.

"Doc?"

"I don't know, Wanda," he admitted, gently. "I won't know until he wakes up. I hope the Heal was enough, but … I'm just not sure right now."

I felt the tears start to well up in my eyes. At the same time, I felt Melanie's arm loop around my shoulders, attempting to hug me. I pulled away from her, not wanting the comfort. I leaned over Ian, watching for any signs of movement.

Suddenly, a strong surge of emotion took over me. My fingers took hold of the collar of his shirt. I felt my voice straining my soar throat as I yelled, "Ian! Ian O'Shea, you are not leaving me! Do you hear me? You wouldn't let me leave you. You made me stay, so you can't leave! Ian? Ian!" My last few words were almost unheard, a high pitched croak.

My body was shaking with emotion now. I felt the sobs come hard and fast, and I buried my face in his shirt. I knew my tears must be soaking it through to his skin.

I don't know how long I cried. Time passes so strangely in moments of emotion. At some point, however, Ian's breathing changed slightly. I felt a hand on my head, touching my golden hair. At first I thought it was Melanie again, trying to sooth me, and I started to shake her off. The hand, however, was far too big to be Melanie's.

"Wanda?"

I jerked upward, my heart coming to an abrupt stop in my chest. "Ian?"

Sure enough, the blue eyes were opened, though dazed looking. Ian stared back at me. "Don't cry," he said. "It's just a … a little scratch. I feel just fine." His eyes turned to Doc. "I'm not hurt … Am I, Doc?"

"I … I don't know. We'll have to wait until the No Pain wears off, but I think … If you're awake … I'm sure you'll be fine."

"Of course he will," Melanie said, her voice full of optimism – a little bit too much optimism. "See, Wanda. Everything's okay."

Ian's hand brushed some tears from my cheek. "Don't cry," he said, again. "You'll make your cold get worse."

I kicked Doc and Melanie out of my room moments later. I stayed in the bedroom with Ian for a long, long time, not willing to share him with anyone. I'd felt that way when I knew he was home, but the idea of nearly losing him made the desire all that more necessary.

We lay in the darkness later that night, Ian's arms wrapped around me. "I don't know why you were so worried," he muttered into my ear, his fingers moving up and down my forearm, leaving trail of goose bumps. "Do you really think I'd let you go now? I haven't had you long enough just yet to leave." His lips found mine in the darkness. "It will be a long time before that day comes. Maybe I'm selfish, but I have no desire to share you."

Sharing. I had shared a body with Melanie, and now we had a connection that, somehow, still connected us. I shared my heart with Ian – my whole soul with Ian – and something told me that, no matter what, we would always be connected somehow.

As it turns out, the bullet had missed all of the vital organs, like Doc thought. The Heal had been enough to fix what damage there was, but Ian had refused to use the Smooth. He claimed that he liked the scar the gunshot had left.

More raids came. It was hard to let Ian go, so from then on I went, too. It didn't matter if I was sneezing or coughing or anything. I would go with Ian, even if he protested. I wasn't ready to share him, either. No seeker, no bullet, was going to take my partner away from me.

He was mine.


End file.
